The Status is Quo

Nothing new. Although she hasn’t had anything to eat or drink in the past 4-5 days, my niece’s condition has not changed much. Cancer is winning. She is non-communicative, and breathing very hard. Many people who knew her have been by to see her and tell her they love her. There is not much else […]

From Memory

Today’s watercolor experiment: Dad died 8 years ago today (by the lunar calendar). I lit a candle and tried drawing him from memory. Dad had a distinctive face and, of all the people I’ve (tried to) sketch, he seemed to be the easiest for me. Seemed to be… After I finished the portrait, I showed it […]

Happy Birthday to Me

Birthdays are bittersweet. I love watching children who express utter delight at the attention and excitement on their own birthdays. I observed this with my grandson at his second birthday a few months ago. We dimmed the lights to show off the cake and its bright candles. William was focused on the cake and the […]

Relapse

State of mind: Fear and sadness have been stalking me. I’m trying to figure out where it is coming from. Buyer’s remorse? I have had that before. I just stocked up on some art supplies that I may or may not have needed. Last night, I really beat myself up. Lots of bad dreams Mom […]

Choice

Change of pace for today. Circumstances dictate that I take a break from the outer landscape to concentrate on the inner, at least for today. Had a crummy night last night. Dreams. I can’t recall exactly what they were, but I’m sure that some of them had to do with my mother, who died in February […]

Blind Portrait

Today’s watercolor experiment: Yesterday I did not take my eyes of the plant I was drawing. I did not look at the paper. Today I did the opposite. I closed my eyes and did not look at the paper or the subject. The subject was my mother’s face. I used to practice drawing her face […]

Unexpected

I decided to take a break from thinking about grief, drawing plants, ferns and fungi. Today’s watercolor experiment: I did not want to think.  I wanted to try my new watercolor paper. It is larger (12″x16″) than the paper I am used to (9″x12″). I pre-wet the paper with my 3” brush, which seemed much […]

By the Waters of Babylon

My wife, Joy and I just started watching Mad Men. Frankly I was a little bit leery about rehashing the 1950s and its prevailing attitudes. Drinking, smoking, antisemitism, treating women badly was the norm back then. The protagonist, Don Draper, is a mysterious, emotionally empty Madison Avenue ad agency creative director. Little by little we […]

Broken

I seem to be surrounded by broken things, things that are incomplete. Mom died just over a month ago, not more than two weeks after her 90th birthday. Many cousins I hadn’t seen in a while came to her party. We all had a great time. I traveled from California to New Jersey to be […]