Birthday Diminishment

I’m having a milestone birthday today. It’s not like it used to be. Nobody knows what I was like when I was a kid any more. They’re all gone. I won’t have to listen to Dad’s yearly reminiscence that I made him miss breakfast the day I was born; I won’t get a call from […]

Tight Rope of Life

When I was a teenager, or maybe it was when I had my first crisis of identity, my father shared one of his metaphors for life. “Life is a tight rope,” he said. I think he was trying to make me feel better by telling me about the first time he slipped off. At this time […]

Distracted Abstract

Background for today’s art: Mixed feelings, mainly sadness. The funeral was today. I’m usually very stoic, but surprised myself by the intensity of my emotions about the death of my niece. The kids came up from down south and one gave a heartfelt eulogy about her cousin. At the reception my niece’s sister presented a slide […]

It Ain’t Pretty

There is an optical effect called the ‘waterfall illusion’. If you have ever watched the credits scroll by at the end of a movie, or scroll a computer screen, and then look at a still picture, it appears to move in the opposite direction. A similar thing happened this morning, when I looked in on […]

The Status is Quo

Nothing new. Although she hasn’t had anything to eat or drink in the past 4-5 days, my niece’s condition has not changed much. Cancer is winning. She is non-communicative, and breathing very hard. Many people who knew her have been by to see her and tell her they love her. There is not much else […]

Vigil

The decline continues. Kidneys still work, dehydration is under way. Our niece was diagnosed with cancer only 7 months ago. Now, the hospice nurse says one or two days are all she has left. Although she’s not comatose, she is less and less responsive. Our job is to regularly administer pain and anti anxiety meds […]

Closer

It could be any time now. Our niece continues to decline from her cancer. Breathing is harder. The only medication she takes now are for pain anxiety. Family members came by all day. My niece’s room was always filled with their respectful, loving presence, in various combinations.

Just Before Waking

Today, it was a struggle to find a subject to draw or paint. I had a dentist’s appointment and was in no mood.  However, when I finally sat down at the desk where I paint, I noticed the sketch of my wife, I did last night. I got out the big paper and decided to […]

Scare

Had a scare today.  While I was at work when I got a call that our loved one’s (C’s) status had changed. She is in hospice care at home. When I got there, C’s breathing was very shallow. She wasn’t moving and did not respond beyond some slurred words, when questioned. Just yesterday was having a […]

Not Afraid

We have been having trouble with cancer lately. Suffice it to say hospice care is the order of the day. Our afflicted loved one is in good spirits, even if not feeling that well. She likes to “tell it like it is” as well as to be told the straight story, without sugar coating. She is […]