Fear of Falling

Today’s study is about fear. It’s not about being afraid to hit the dirt, but rather fear for those getting older and gradually losing what they once had. There are transitions in life: from being a pre-teenager to teenager hood; from being a student to working for a living; from being a worker to being […]

Birthday Diminishment

I’m having a milestone birthday today. It’s not like it used to be. Nobody knows what I was like when I was a kid any more. They’re all gone. I won’t have to listen to Dad’s yearly reminiscence that I made him miss breakfast the day I was born; I won’t get a call from […]

Abstract 110916

As with yesterday’s painting, I also made today’s painting a day before the US election. Its colors are on the red end of the spectrum. I suspect that most of my paintings in the foreseeable future will be  more toward the cooler blue end. Not for any political reasons, but rather to portray the emotional imbalance I feel. I […]

Tight Rope of Life

When I was a teenager, or maybe it was when I had my first crisis of identity, my father shared one of his metaphors for life. “Life is a tight rope,” he said. I think he was trying to make me feel better by telling me about the first time he slipped off. At this time […]

Scare

Had a scare today.  While I was at work when I got a call that our loved one’s (C’s) status had changed. She is in hospice care at home. When I got there, C’s breathing was very shallow. She wasn’t moving and did not respond beyond some slurred words, when questioned. Just yesterday was having a […]

Dream Portrait: In Fear

I had an odd dream sequence last night. It really wasn’t a sequence, though. The same theme played over and over in different guise each and every time I struggled to consciousness and slipped back under. I was disoriented in my dream state, but I knew if I pried my eyes open I would be able to tell where I was. […]

Relapse

State of mind: Fear and sadness have been stalking me. I’m trying to figure out where it is coming from. Buyer’s remorse? I have had that before. I just stocked up on some art supplies that I may or may not have needed. Last night, I really beat myself up. Lots of bad dreams Mom […]

Dot Crazy

Watercolor/ink experiment: I painted the conglomeration of dots you see below, a couple of days ago, in the midst of my ink dot exploration craze – I mean, phase. In this composition I washed the paper with Prussian blue and cadmium yellow pale before dotting. I used a combination of drawing and calligraphy inks on […]

Violence

Scanning I am in the process of scanning all my handwritten journals into my computer, an endeavor that my wife doesn’t understand. I tell her that once the journals are safely in the computer, I can upload them to the ‘cloud’, make backups, and never run the risk of losing the content; besides we’re moving […]