Happy Birthday, Mike

My brother Mike is 65 today (11-11-14).  He is my older brother, autistic, very low functioning, and has never said a word in his whole life.  I began this blog to relate my experiences in trying to get to know him – a daunting task, when you consider I  never knew if he knew who […]

Autism Sibling & Expression

This is a difficult post to write. As many of you know, I began this blog as a continuation of my efforts to define my relationship with my older autistic brother. Mike is very low functioning as well as profoundly retarded. For 11 months I posted about what it was like for me as a […]

Consequences

The subject of yesterday’s post was advice. I was aghast that some people would actually consider not listening to me, in my well-considered analyses of their problems. Today I want to discuss the idea of responsibility. If my advice was actually correct, my advisee did not follow it and dire consequences occurred, how should I […]

The Visit

Mike looked really old. That was what struck me the most. He also had a low frequency tremor. He also had only one useable eye. the other one was all cataracted over. Portrait of three brothers No need for Photoshop. My two brothers and I are all in the same place at the same time, […]

Busy People

Most people I know are busy. I think that if you are busy as a child, you will be a busy adult. My granddaughter, nine years old, is always involved in one project or another. Her mom, was the same way as a child and is a dynamo today. She is continually in motion. Ben […]

Halloween Party with Mike

My older brother Mike is autistic, profoundly retarded and nonverbal. I had gone to parties at his group home before. I thought I had seen everything, and then I went to his Halloween Party. It was being held at a group residence in one of the bad areas of New York City, a place where […]

Message to Siblings

I hope I havn’t misled The major focus of my blog is autism from the point of view of a sibling. My older brother, Michael is autistic, low functioning and nonverbal. He was at home until I was about 10 years old. After he went to Willowbrook, a large mental institution on Staten Island, we […]

Dying

Over the past few days and weeks, end-of-life issues have surrounded me. A wonderful blogger friend of mine is having problems; on my wife’s side of the family, several of her relatives are gravely ill and not expected to live very long; a former colleague of mine took his own life just a few days […]

Loving

Group home buddies When I visited my older brother, Michael, in his group home, I always enjoyed talking with some of his housemates. Of course, there were some who, like Mike, seemed to be beyond communication. One resident, J___, always seemed interested in what I was doing. He must have been profoundly deaf, as his […]

Mike’s World

Some people think that I am obsessed by my relationship with my older brother, Mike. That is probably true. The saying, “You always want what you don’t have,” is true for me. It sounds weird, but I never have known my brother personally. But if you know about him, it is not that surprising after […]