I would often meet my parents at Mike’s group home when we used to visit. Below are some pictures that show their interactions with Mike*.
From June 24, 2013 (Private Moment):
The first photo depicts the isolation that was the rule rather than the exception. Mom was very sensitive about this, and thought it was rejection.
Mom love this picture. She had it framed and kept it on her dresser.
From October 11, 2013 (Empathy – Take 1)
Here are a couple of more interactions between Mom and Mike:
I love these photos, but in actuality, there was a very narrow range of emotional interaction between Mike and the rest of the family. See my post Photography and Truth.
- Mike is my older brother who is autistic, low functioning and has never spoken.
….what appears to be going on, and what is actually going on speak profoundly to the mysteries of life–so much of what we think we know, we don’t really know…and similarly what we find absent is perhaps more present than it comes across. In my capacity as a pastor I had occasion to regularly visit a very elderly woman who was curled in the fetal position in a crib, and never spoke or acknowledged I was there. I would read to her, try to show her photographs, carrying on a one-sided and, what I thought was, a futile interaction. After 3 years of this, I was leaving her at what turned out to be her final days, and she was in hospital. When I read her a Psalm, I turned out the light and started towards the hallway and suddenly heard this very high, very ‘other worldly’, extended, almost-sung, ‘thannnnkkkkkk youuuuuuu!’. It brought me to tears, and does even now writing this. Love transcends in ways we do not fathom…but the main thing is continuing to love–which you all are.
It was a wonderful thing that your interaction with the elderly woman ultimately ended in an acknowledgement of your presence. It was even more wonderful that you persisted for three years without the expectation of acknowledgement. In the absence of acknowledgement, one must believe that communications are being received on some level. I’m not that big in the ‘faith’ department, but I am open to the suggestion that there may be some plane on which communication happens… perhaps like the shadows in Plato’s cave.
Thank you for your comment, as always.
Jack
….your devotion to bringing your brother greater life is faith indeed
That is very kind of you to say, and gives me a new perspective on faith. Thank you.
j
I am moved by the photographs, your commentary and the conversation here. Thank you.